British food gets roasted
If the thought of jelly with bits in gives you the ick, it might explain the top-searched question about British cuisine worldwide in the past year. Ready? It was…
Why is British food so bad?😲
There is NOTHING wrong with putting gravy on everything or naming a pudding after a diseased appendage*
British food businesses, show ‘em what you’ve got (unless it’s a diseased appendage then, no thank you).
*Spotted Dick
Orange ain’t the new cheese
Things are much calmer on the food front in ‘Murica, where searches for cottage cheese bread were up more than 140%, while cottage cheese flatbread was the top trending viral recipe. Could the nation that put orange cheese in a can finally be learning that real food exists? 🧀
@healthylittlepeach The viral cottage cheese flatbread blew my mind. It grossed me out when I first saw it, but now that I’ve tried it, it’s AMAZING! Thanks @healthymumway for creating this amazing recipe. I also sqw @Shredhappens version. 10/10! 1 cup cottage cheese 2 eggs 1/2 tsp garlic powder 1/2 tsp onion powder 1.5 tsp Italian seasoning -Add to a blender or food processor. Blend well. Line a small baking pan with parchment paper. Pour the cottage cheese mixture in and spread out evenly. -Bake on 350F for 40 minutes! -Use as bread and build a sandwich! I am using Tzatziki, chicken, tomatoes, arugula and red onion! #cottagecheese #cottagecheeseflatbread #healthyrecipes #lowcarbrecipes #viralrecipe ♬ original sound – Mac
E.coli-wobble
Back in England, we were warned by the Health Security Agency about a ‘nationally distributed food item’ linked to an E.coli outbreak.
In a mike-drop move worthy of EastEnders’ dum dums, the Agency DID NOT SAY what the aforementioned dodgy food item was. Scan your cupboards NOW… 😱😱😱
Reality royalty
God bless Joey Essex ❤️ and all who sail in him for putting Love Island back in the internet search spotlight and trouncing The Traitors (how quickly we forget). At 33, he’s the show’s oldest-ever participant. It also makes him about 1,000 in reality telly years 👴😆
Still, the self-proclaimed King of Essex 🤴 is “extremely single” and Love Island ain’t his “first rodeo”. Reem as ever Joey, reem as ever.
Merry Kelly
Getting a bounce from related searches was the lovely Kelly Brook, She may have gone from being crowned FHM’s Sexiest Woman in the World in 2005 to living her loved-up best life with husband Jeremy Parisi ❤️❤️❤️ but hasn’t stopped searches for her 2024 calendar spiking by over 160%. Well jell.
Barbie bounces back
Proof you can’t keep a good woman down – even if you drop a nuclear bomb on her with Cillian Murphy’s half-starved face slapped all over it – came with the UK’s top-searched films.
Alex Garland’s Civil War came first but Barbie, with her pastel-coloured 🖕🖕🖕 to the patriarchy was snapping at its heels in second place. Memo to film-makers: MORE OF THIS PLEASE.
Back of the net
In the same way that you don’t have to be crazy to work (insert your chosen location here), the documentary series 99 proved you don’t have to be a footie fan or love Ryan Reynolds to enjoy a show about it.
It topped the UK searches for documentaries in the past month, in a list that included Amy Winehouse (💔) and Bon Jovi, as well as Kevin Spacey and Gary Glitter 💩💩
Cannes-ed heat
Most of us don’t have a clue who’s taking part in the Cannes Film Festival 📽️ but people searching the web in Scotland and Wales have been OBSESSED with the place. Maybe it’s not so much the ‘ooh-la-la’ of it all as the “OMG I can finally see the sun!” ☀️
Film fans in Ireland preferred the bright lights of Utah and the Sundance Festival while in England, they stayed close to home with the BFI London Film Festival. Bring on those buckets of 🍿🍿🍿
Med spa shenanigans
When life gives you lemons, sod ‘em and start looking into med spas, according to our ‘Murican cousins. Heads up all you aestheticians – this one’s for you.
Among the top questions related to the industry were how much 💵 med spa owners made and “how to become a nurse injector”. Yes, that is learning how to stick someone with 💉💉💉
Well flip my lip
More popular internet queries from across the pond include “what is a lip flip”? It might sound made up but it’s a proper funky name for a filler treatment 🤷♀️🤷♀️. After you’ve had it, you can give your mush a workout by reciting another top search: ultherapy 🤣
E-skin me alive
It was only a matter of time that, after e-mail, e-commerce and everything else electric 🔌, the people in white coats got round to our bodies. Yup, peeps in China have developed e-skin and claim it can perceive touch 🤯🤯🤯
Call in the lawyers, it’s time for a sleep divorce
We get the usual blend of US batshit ‘n’ bullshit from the country where “nose job or part time job” were among the top search trends.
Couples looking to get a few extra 😴😴😴 are searching for a ‘sleep divorce’ – they snooze in separate beds so everything else in their relationship is 👍
If your business is in the relaxation game, this trend’s one to watch.
Come eye-gain?
That’s relatively normal compared to the eyebrow blindness 👀 phenom. Searches for this facial faux pas (in which your eyebrows do not match the shape of your face 😱) spiked almost 3,000%. Can we blame the Kardashians? 🤔
Mommy makeover and vampire breast lift
Something is going wildly wrong among ‘Murican mums, as the top trending cosmetic procedure questions were “what is a mommy makeover surgery?” and “what is a vampire breast lift?”.
We suspect the latter ain’t Dracula sticking his hand in your G cup and saying in a heavy Transylvanian accent: “Mwa-ha-ha-you don’t get many of those to the pound”…
It’s hot in here…
One of the most recent top US beauty trends was “boyfriend blush”, rising by more than 190%. This is not what you think.
Brace yourselves: it gives you the face of a flustered man – specifically your other half – right after they’ve finished exercising. Maybe they should have called it “sweaty beetroot” 🥵?
Coffee badgering and hush vacays
Leave it to US remote workers to get really creative when it comes to clocking on and buggering off. Two major trends are ‘coffee badgering’ and ‘hush vacations’.
The first is someone who comes into the office long enough to have a sniff of a brew ☕ and a natter before sidling off home. The second is a remote worker sets up shop in a holiday location 🏖️ but doesn’t tell their boss.
Fair play to them – if the Great British weather lived up to its name, we’d all be doing it.
If you’re a B&B owner, crank up that WiFi.
Farewell Rob Burrow
You didn’t have to be a rugby league fan to feel the wave of love that followed the death of 41-year-old Leeds Rhinos legend Rob Burrow 💔
He was diagnosed with motor neurone disease (MND) four and a half years previously, and his untimely passing saw search queries for the disease increase by more than 1,800%.
If this touches a chord, make sure you follow @mndassoc.
Thank you Michael
Another sad one: the hugely popular TV doctor topped UK search trends after he was found dead on the Greek island of Symi 💔 four days after going missing during a heatwave.
Let’s hear it for the men
In much better news, it’s good to see searches about men’s mental health month were up more than 800%, topping May’s ‘when is’ search in the UK. For the record, it’s in November (along with International Men’s Day @UKMensDay).
For advice and support, follow @MaleWellbeingUK.
Elections, elections, everywhere
Isn’t it always the same? You’re not bothered about an election and then suddenly they’re bloody EVERYWHERE. A bit like weeds.
The one we’re all interested in is between Biden (should he live that long 😬) and the unhinged orange buffoon but we have to wait until November for that insane rematch, unless the latter’s eating porridge somewhere…
Home-grown squabbles
In the meantime, Labour leader Keir Starmer is trying to prove he’s really not dull as piss 😑, while UK PM Rishi Sunak pissed off just about everyone by ducking out of D-Day commemorations early. There really are no words for that one.
Pound-shop politicians
Maybe ask these two. Diane Abbott was the top trending person searched over the UK general election thanks to the kerfuffle over whether she could stand or not. She can.
However, just like soured milk(shake) when it hits your stomach, Nigel Farage began moving upwards.
Before checking that your eyebrows match your face 🤦♀️ or you catch up on what Joey Essex 😎 has been up to, make sure you sign up for next month’s round-up of our top trending Google Searches. We’ll have them stripped, washed and sent straight to your inbox before you’ve checked your Facebook.
